The Eviction Papers Have Been Served!

Ok Mindy the Meningioma have been served her eviction papers.  With God's help she can leave on her own or with the surgeons help be forced out.  She needs to leave my head.  She is causing more and more problems the longer she stays. It's bad enough I have lost some hearing in my right ear and have that constant ringing going on. I can't walk at a normal pace without getting dizzy. It is difficult to stay focused on anything for any period of time.  I went to a wedding yesterday and we were home by 3 and I was in the bed the rest of the day. I wake up at 5am to a splitting headache. I can't take anything but tylenol (which doesn't do a thing for me) so I suffer because of Mindy GRRRRRRRRRR.  SHE GOT TO GO!  So I find out tomorrow which way she decides to go.  I have to have another MRI before the surgery. I would like for her to take God's assistance and just disappear. Mindy has been a true pain. If the surgeon has to be the one to remove her, I plan on continuing my blog at the hospital. My daughter and husband will probably have Facebook post about my recovery from surgery. I still believe God will do whatever is in my best interest. Maybe a great blessing will come about with me having surgery.  Who knows God's plan.  I guess I will find out tomorrow.

Driving

I drove today.  I haven't driven a car since about a week before my surgery.  It felt kinda weird and liberating at the same time.  I am sore now.  I still have  to take it kinda easy.  I still can't reach but so far with my right side. Plus I have pain all along my right side of my back. I got my first fill Thursday.  My chest feels tight.  I still have to compress that side for 1 more week.  The Dr. told me it hasn't been 6 weeks yet.  I was like "What?"  It feels like it.  Sleep is uncomfortable again... I guess it's back to my comfy recliner.

 I want to throw a big party next year for my birthday next year.  43 will be awesome because I know in 1 year I will be back to normal in every way.  All my surgeries for reconstruction will be done.I will be feeling strong again.This birthday I will be happy I made it.  Next year I will be happy I survived.

Well back to the driving part.... The Dr. told me it hurts because I haven't used that muscle much. So I can drive short distances.  So I guess I won't be back to work yet since my job requires me to drive around the city.  Plus driving today I think made my chest hurt.  I kept wanting to drive with my right hand. I was in pain every time I did!  I had to act like I had a stick shift to keep from putting my right hand on the wheel.  But I still did it.  I was able to drive my car from the old apartment to our new home. I unpacked part of my kitchen then I needed a nap.  Matt and Jay took care of the living room and the dining room. I slowly did the bathroom and I will work on our bedroom and finish the kitchen this week.  I won't be driving unless I have to. But it still felt good to drive again.

1 week later

It has been one week since my surgery.  How do I feel?  Good question.  I looked at myself in the mirror this morning.  I dunno, I didn't really feel any certain way.  I wasn't sad or mad,  just felt nothing.  Maybe because I know this is a process and before long I will look and feel normal again. I feel better than yesterday. Adjusting to my new body.  I'm so ready to workout, zumba or something. I know in time.

I had a dream the other day that I woke up and had both my breast and no cancer in my body.  This whole cancer thing was a dream.  It is still hard to believe sometimes.  I look at myself and wonder "did this really happen".  I don't feel like I'm living my life.  It gets really weird if you think about it too much.

I had a great talk with Nay(my daughter) this morning.  It feels good when you know that your child really appreciates everything you have done for them and they give you credit for who they have become.  My NayNay monster has grown up to be a fab young woman.  I miss having her around even tho we talk several times a day...lol    Hopefully I will hear something back about the pathology report today.  I'm ready to get moving on this.