Week 6 & 7 Recovery

 Well I had a little bit of an issue early in 6th week... but it was the nerves waking up and it was painful.  It let me dizzy and just felt bad.  It only lasted a couple of days.  But the pain shows up off and on and throws me off. I'm getting out and walking more.  I just can't walk as fast as I use to ....dizziness kicks in so slow going for me.  I had a great time for my birthday(March 28).  Had breakfast with my mom and then a long nap(3 hours) then dinner with hubby at a hibachi restaurant.  It was fun.  I was concerned if the noise from the chef would bother me and it didn't.  The lights were low and it wasn't real noisy.  I loved it.  Then my daughter came in town to pamper me.  So her and her best friend Symone took me to the MAC store to get my makeup done.  I felt nice to brighten up my look. It felt to nice to feel pretty. I enjoyed being in the mall.  I has been a long time since I have been able to walk around a mall.  We got there early to make it easier on me. By the time we left it was pretty busy and things were bothering me. Between the lights and the people and just mall noise it was getting to be a bit much and I started to get pains in my head.  Then we went to get our nails done.  That was nice and relaxing. It has been over a year since I had my nails done so I enjoyed the pampering.  Then we went to a nice Mexican restaurant that reminded Nay of Texas. I needed a very long nap after that day. 

Now week 7.  I went to church (where my husband is the pastor) Sunday.  Loved it.  I miss my Faith Church Baltimore family and fellowship.  I was tired but it was a good tired.  The noise bother me some.  My head feels like it is tightening along the incision and I still get shocks of sharp pains  at time.  I drove this week.  I had to take Dylan to the DR. for a checkup.  I did good driving.  Now having a toddler all day by myself is another story. I get tired very easy.  I don't have the energy to care for a 2 year old all day.  I thank God for Aunt Ann.  She has been a true blessing watching him during the day while I heal.  When I rest up during the day I have the energy to care for him when he comes home in the evening. 

Now I am experiencing a sweet taste in my mouth all the time.  I go to see the dr. next week.  I'm not getting headaches as much.  Just the sharp pains that come and go.  I can actually say I am feeling good. I feel my life is better since Mindy the Meningioma was removed.  I am getting stronger and stronger every day.  God gets all the Glory.  I trusted Him.  I trusted He would care for me and He did. I am proof that God will keep his promises. But that will be another whole post...lol.   I'm not 100% yet I would say 70%.  There are still some things I can't do but I am healing and happy.  I'm gonna try water aerobics this weekend to see if I can handle it. I am walking more than I was able to before the surgery.  I am taking one day at a time. But I am having more good days than bad.

So very Thankful. 

Thank You God!!!

 Well I made it thru surgery fantastic.!!!!  I was told that the nerves were wrapped around the tumor quite a bit that's why they had to have more monitoring during my surgery cause it was going to be more complicated.  God ...God was there.  My surgery was only 6 hours long instead of 9 and the doctors said the nerves just bent out the way so he could remove the tumor.  NO NO nerves were cut,  Even a very sensitive nerve that controls my swallowing was just fine.  I'm not using much pain meds.  I normally have problems with my IV cause I can only use the one arm from breast cancer surgery NO problems there.  I had brain surgery on Tuesday and I am home doing well on Sat.  God did this.  I stayed faithful. I never doubted Him.  Even when my symptoms were getting worst I knew God would take care of me.  So many prayers went up that morning and I am so very thankful and grateful for His love.
 I was able to walk a flight a stairs yesterday very well.  I just have to use a few tricks to help my brain heal and regain more independence.  I will be going to outpatient therapy to help me get stronger. I wish I could go to church today but just a walk to the bathroom is enough excitement for me these days..lol    But God knows my praise!!  I will be back soon Faith Church Baltimore


PS.  I am asking for help with meals for my family since I am the family chef...lol A website has been set up to help schedule meals if you would like to help.  I normally don't ask for help but I realize the brain is very sensitive and I will take a little more time getting back to my normal routine. Because of my husband's job and pastoring a church and taking care of home I know the meals would be one less worry for him. So if you would like to bless us with a meal please inbox me for the website and password to set a date.  Thank you for your help.

What a difference a year makes!

Next Wednesday  I will be 42. So in 1 year I have lost a gall bladder and a breast. But I have gained a wonderful, loving husband(Matthew Bradby) and soon a baby boy(Dylan), I have a new home and a fabulous church family.  I have been blessed with so many new friends thru Facebook. I have also gain a closeness with God that I wouldn't have made it thru the rough times without.And my faith in God is stronger!  Am I the same person?  Hmmm I'm still caring, loving and all those nice things people say..lol  What is different..... I'm happier, stronger mentally, I allow myself to cry. I have proven to myself that I am a lot tougher than I thought.  I'm still hard headed...lol (God is working with me on that one)

Because of this breast cancer, my life will never be the same.  I have to look at everything different now.  I was looking at summer dresses and tank tops yesterday and I had consider how much of my scar will show.  I never had to even think about that before.  Even in the grocery store I had to watch what food I buy..Organic food is expensive but the other stuff is unhealthy for me. The funny thing was I use to think Fibromyalgia was tough.  Yeah I did have to change how I did some things .....but it just seemed easier.

What a difference a year makes!!  Some might look at last year of my life as being bad, I look at it as being great!!! There were lessons learned.  Every wall that was put in front of me I have knocked down and moved closer to my destiny. These are lessons I will need to master in order to move to my next level.  I must be learning fast with so many of then hitting me in 1 year...lol  The biggest lesson I have learned (this is the one God has been trying to get me to learn most of my life) is to have more faith in myself, trust your gut,trust your strength and always remember God will never leave your side.

Moved

Ok We have moved into our new home.  Thanks to Janet Garland for coming over at the last minute and staying with me late last night.  Thanks to the guys  for helping, I will be cooking a Big thank you dinner for everybody.  Matt wouldn't let me do too much but pack some things. That alone was enough.  I am sore all over.  I mean every muscle in my body is aching. It is mostly my fibromyalgia flaring up.  I didn't get any sleep yesterday so my body is over tired.  I kinda new I would be flaring up today but I'm still thankful to be in my new home.  I do have to get use to steps again......UGGGGG..That is the only thing I miss about the apartment..lol.

Now my breast cancer ... I am doing very well.  I had a couple of muscle spams but doing better and better everyday.  I get my first fill in my tissue expander on Thursday.  I'm a little nervous but ready to move forward. Meet with the oncologist next week.  I got my list of questions and concerns ready. I know I need to make a lot of changes in my life to stay as cancer free as possible. Sucks my cancer cells want to have a party in my body. 

Now we got more room, next step is to get my new baby boy Dylan.  right now its all up to me.  I need to get well enough to be able to pick him up.  He is 9 months old and a lil chunky thing..lol  He is such a cutie pie. I hope to have him home with us by Easter.

So today I will be resting and looking at all these boxes.  My body has told me enough and shutting things down for the day.  That's one thing about fibromyalgia, it will not let me get away with pushing my body.. I will suffer for it later.  Hopefully this flare up only last 1 day.  So its a day of TV and sleep for me.

Promises were kept.

I was promised that all I needed was surgery.  And yes that was all I needed to get rid of the present cancer. God kept his promise to me.  He also told it it wasn't going to be easy.  I had questioned that because I actually having a easy time healing with no problems or complications.  I thought I had this cancer thing in the bag, thrown out, gone, CANCER FREE.  Well God did keep his promise, all I needed was surgery to rid my body of this cancer.  Then I find out that there was more cancer in my breast then what was first found and my test score came back higher then I had expected.  So I asked God "What is up with this?  You promised all I needed was surgery."  Now the fight is to keep it from coming back.  This is so much harder than I ever expected.  Some people reactions are really throwing for a loop.  I am so scared...so so scared. I don't want to go thru this again.  Nothing is guaranteed.  God did tell me I wouldn't die from this.  Did he mean breast cancer or cancer in general?  I'm praying for help in this decision. I'm being told to wait.  I guess the answer will be clear when the time is right. My surgeon said that the oncology team highly recommend chemo because of my young age and that multiple tumors were found. I believe that if i didn't have the surgery when I did, it would have spread to my lymph nodes then there wouldn't be any questions. But God had my Dr. move quickly cause he was concerned about my lymph nodes. Sometimes I wonder if I should have had my other breast removed but I don't think that would have helped much since the cancer can show up else where in my body ie: bones,liver.

What to do...what to do..All God is telling me right now is wait. That is what I have been doing but the wait is not easy.  God has been honest with me and no matter what others may think He is what have been guiding me. He has not steered me wrong yet on this journey. I'm holding on to my faith with all my might. I was told this will be tough... I guess this is the rough, rocky road I'm about to travel. All I can do is strap on my seat belt and had God the keys.

Feeling some kind of way

I'm feeling some kind of way today.  Today is the day I get the results of the OncotypeDX Test (tells me the chances of the cancer coming back).  I find out if I need chemo or not.  I know God told me "just surgery"  He also told me I will be ok.  Me and my family have been given so many blessings sine we found out about the cancer.  God has told me this road will be tough and hard but it will be worth it in the end.  I was also told that there are more blessings to come.

While looking over the paperwork and my pathology report I notice that my cancer had changed.  When it was first found they were a stage 0 and stage 1.  By the time of surgery they were a stage 1 and stage 2.  The tumors had grown larger. So I know several of my other numbers that they use as markers must have increased. That is why I am concerned.  I wonder if the original treatment plan has changed.  God has me on this road where I don't know where I going and all I know is I will be ok at the end.  This is not easy to surrender all to God (especially when I like to control everything...lol)  I know this is a test of my faith and each time I hold on He blesses me for my obedience. I'm not sure if being scared is what I'm feeling or worry.. I don't know what it is I just feel some kind of way.

I still don't like taking a shower.  I haven't gotten use to my new body.  The good thing is that when I went to church this past Sunday, you couldn't tell anything was gone cause I have so  much padding compressing me I look almost even.lol   I know I will have new boobs by summer..... There goes that test of patience again I guess..lol.. This blog has been great therapy. I have been reading other survivors stories too.  They seem to help a lot. So tonight I find out how I will be spending my spring and summer.  All I keep hearing is God saying" I got you"

3 weeks today

It has been 3 weeks since my surgery.  Things have been very interesting the past couple of days.  I went to church Sunday.  I had quite a bit of anxiety about going.  Me being loopsided started to get to me for the first time. And with me being the "First Lady" I knew people would be looking at me.  The only person who saw my tears was my husband.  He did his best to talk me down and convinced me not to wear this huge sweater I wanted to wear(I probably would have lost 10lb in sweat if I wore it lol).  When we got to the church I went straight to my office.  I had to sit in there a bit before joining everyone else for service.  Everybody was so nice and loving. They did everything they could to make sure I was comfortable as possible. I'm glad I went.  I love Faith Church Baltimore.  I did discover that you use some of your chest muscles when you clap.. so clapping during praise and worship was a little tough.  After service, my hubby fed me some fried fish (another one of my cravings) and I slept the rest of the day.

I guess this is where the fibromyalgia really kicks in.  I slept most of Monday. Good news is I was able to get my drainage tube removed on Tuesday.  The Dr. said I am healing well and they will start filling my expander in 2 weeks.  I had another anxiety moment right before my appointment.  I just started getting frustrated with not being able to be independent like I was before cancer.  I know in time I will be, it still gets to me.  I finally got use to dealing with the fibromyalgia and now cancer.  I still don't know what my treatment will be for sure. I guess God is having me repeat the lesson on patience.  Waiting for my body to heal, waiting for the test results, waiting for my new breast.... yeah. I'm repeating this lesson. So now I'm sore from where the tube was removed and I have to have my right "breast" compressed at all times so fluid doesn't build up before they start to fill the expander(this is uncomfortable).  I still have to take it easy.  Honestly... I'm tired of taking it easy...lol  I have been resting and sleeping for 3 weeks now.  Guess I have to be patient.

SUNDAY 1/29/2012

It's Sunday morning at 7am nobody else is up yet.  I have quite a bit of pain under my arm.  I have emailed my Dr already. I'm sitting here watching TD Jakes.  Why does it always seems like he is talking to me?...lol.

I'm looking forward to service.  Being at the church helps.  The members are so supportive.
If some of you don't know my husband. Bishop Matthew E Bradby II, is a pastor of Faith Church Baltimore (401 East Lorraine ave, Baltimore Md 21218)  I had to plug that in...lol  Oh yeah service starts at 11am.

I guess the hardest part about all this is the waiting... I really just want to get this over with but I know moving fast right now is not in God's plan.  So I wait.