Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Acoustic Neuroma or Meningioma?

I plan recording my journey with this tumor and better health.  2 week ago I saw the ENT at John Hopkins  Dr. Limb, He said he doesn't believe I have an acoustic neuroma.  He believes it's a meningioma.  The difference is one is on the nerve to my ear  and the other is on the lining of my brain.  He said it looked like it was on the lining and spreads out to the nerve.  They won't know for sure until they get in my head.

Jan 14th is surgery day.  The nurse called me the other day with the schedules for tests
 and surgery time. I became nervous for the first time.  i still have a hard time believing this really happening. Breast cancer was a shock.  A brain tumor seems so unbelievable.  But I guess it's real because I am starting to have other symptoms.  The most frustrating one if the tingling and numbness and weakness in my right hand and arm.  Just imagine your arm and hands falling asleep all the time.  I also learned some of my confusion and forgetfulness  is from the tumor. So with that all said I am ready for this thing to get out of my head and get back to normal.

The closer it get to the surgery date and after I will probably doing video blogs showing my recovery.  I really hope what I am going thru helps another person get thru this.  God is my rock and I couldn't have done this without Him.  I know whatever reason I have to deal with this something good is going to come out of it.  God only have my best interest at heart.

Monday, December 16, 2013

Freedom

I had plan on no longer using a relaxer in my hair and was trying to decide what to do with my hair.  Since I am due to have surgery to remove a brain tumor next month I was thinking about cutting my hair  or  getting braids or something. Well I woke up Sunday morning tired of dealing with the different textures on my head and I asked my husband to cut my hair.  I wasn't sure if he was willing to do it but he did it with joy...lol.  

When I sat in the chair, I almost changed my mind but I didn't and I am very happy I didn't.  This is a very freeing change for me. It was also a symbol of me getting rid of the old.  The last couple of years have been tough.  I ready for something fresh and new. Once this tumor is removed I will be on my way to a new me. 

So Dec. 15,2013  BIG CHOP DAY.  I am excited to see my natural hair grow. Right now it is very curly and soft .. I really like it.  No regrets.

Friday, November 1, 2013

Book Two Of My Journey

God definitely have a plan for me.  3 months ago I found out I have a brain tumor.  It wasn't cancer so that was good, it was slow growing and that was good. The plan was to watch it and it I start having problems then it would be treated.  Well 3 months later the tumor has grown and is causing me problems.  It is call Acoustic Neuroma,  It sits on the nerves of my right ear causing hearing loss in that ear.  I was sent to a specialize specialist at John Hopkins.  I need surgery.  Isn't that crazy.... BRAIN SURGERY.  God must have a really big plans for me.

Can I be honest.  I am so tired of Doctors, Hospitals,SURGERIES, pain pills.....all I can really do is laugh.  This won't kill me, just get in the way of my life...lol   I know at some point God will let me know what His plan is for me.  Part of me want to sit in the corner and cry and the other part say "suck it up, put your big girl panties on and let's get tru this."  So I have been in deep prayer and meditating and visualizing the tumor shrinking.  Maybe God will give me a Christmas miracle. I know God has my best interest at heart and will be with me through this whole thing.

So back to the tumor.  I am loosing my hearing in my right ear.  I will be having surgery after the holidays (which is what I wanted)  So I'm gonna be taking lots of pics  :)  There is a chance of 10% chance of facial paralyzation.  I am not crazy about that at all.  I have a very nice smile  :)  seeee.....lol    There is s very good chance I will lose total hearing in my right ear. The good part is that I will be fine after the surgery.  They got a world renown doctor that will help with getting hearing back in my right ear.  The surgery will last 8 to 10 hours....uggg and I will be in the hospital for about a week. Recovery will be 6 to 8 week.  So I will be all good by my birthday  YAYYYY. The great thing is that John Hopkins have a whole Acoustic Neuroma department so I know I will have a lot of great support.

What is keep me together.... MY FAITH. I'm holding onto God with everything I have.  I am really too tired to fight this battle, I have handed it over to God. Whatever road he have me travel I will travel.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

My Ipsy Bag

I blame my sister for this.  She post about her monthly boxes she gets and I was very curious about them, so I tried one.  Ipsy,  it's only $10 a month and the send you all kinds of make up stuff.  This is my 3rd month getting it and I really like them.  You get a cute makeup bag also.  This month I really like the polish, cool color. I will try it after Oct.  This is my pink month.  I also got this cool navy mineral makeup eyeshadow.  Can't wait to try that color.  They also sent a brush. The pink lip liner I know I will use.  The hair spray I probably wont use since I'm wearing braids.  I really like this month's bag.. it's really cute. So check them out Ipsy Bag 

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

October..... Can I be Honest

Can I be honest.  This is a hard month for me.  Yes I am so very thankful for being cancer free right now and I am so very thankful that I didn't have to go thru chemo or radiation. It's just kinda hard seeing the changes my body has gone thru in the past year and a half with all the surgeries I needed. There are some other things going on but I don't want to discuss them until some more conformation later this month.  I am still not able to do some of things I use to do or want to do.The meds are rough on me with some of the side effects.  Sometimes I just want to forget I ever had cancer.  Cancer has really turned my life upside down.  This surgery induced menopause I'm in doesn't help either..lol  Maybe I am just a little more emotional lol.  I think a lot of it has to do with not having much control over my body...

The up side is that I am cancer free. Because of I what I have gone thru many women I know have gone and had their mammograms. Thank God no one has been diagnosed with breast cancer.... that I know of.  This is not an easy fight.  It's a battle physically, mentally and emotionally.  God has help me keep laughing thru this journey.  I still have a very long life to live. I have had to make a few adjustments  but I plan on being around to see my great grans. God has help me become a stronger person over the last year.

So rock your Pink this month... Get you Mammogram!!

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

First Workout in 2 Years

Today is a good day.  Today is the first time I have been able to take water aerobics since my breast surgery.  I feel so good.  My instructor was great.  She modified some of the exercises for me because of the hernia surgery.  I t feels so good to be out and moving again.  I really need to loose some weight.. I have gained over 20lbs in the last 6 months.  It is nice to feel normal again.  I plan on keeping it up and soon I will be able to use weights.  I just so excited at how good I feel right now.  I'm tired but not as sleepy as I usually am this time of day.  Thank you God for the restoration.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Life

It has been some time since I last posted. Well since the last time I was diagnosed with a very large abdominal hernia so they had to open me up thru my last scar and fix it.  I am doing well.  I am doing well on the new cancer meds.  My daughter Nay is in the Air Force stationed in Texas for tech school.  I miss her so much but it is nice to be able to call her now.

 Life has a funny way of throwing things at you. I have new battle scars now.  They bother me sometimes.  I still remember how my body use to look 1 1/2  years ago. I have also gain a little more weight than I care to have... working on that now.  It seems like every time I feel strong again God throws something else at me.  I am starting to feel strong again, like my old self.  But this is a scary feeling because of the past year.  I am so over operations and hospitals and pain meds.

I thank God for my family, my husband has been so wonderful thru this whole journey.  He makes me feel so beautiful and loved and wanted no matter how I look or feel.  I love him so much.

I have been praying for good health and complete healing of my body. Ohh yeah dealing with menopause has been interesting.  Hot flashes are crazy. But like I said I am doing well. So I am still on this faith journey, I have my highs and lows. So I just hang on to God and enjoy the ride.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

God got this!!!

First my baby girl left for basic this morning  :( :( :(  The Air Force is very lucky to get her.  It was very hard to talk to her with out crying.. but I did it.  She told me I wasn't allowed to  cry while on the phone.  Good thing she couldn't see the tears running down my face.  I am so so proud of her.  This will be an adjustment not having her to talk to everyday.  I have already bought several cute cards to send her along with cute stationary for her letters.

Next I had 2 doctors appointments this morning.  The first was to the hand doctor.  My carpal tunnel has gotten worst and he gave me shots in my hands.  I was also told I will need surgery in about a year if the shots work,  If they don't well I will need it sooner.  Then I also had an appointment with the surgeon that did my hysterectomy because I was having pain in my side.  Well I was told I have all the symptoms of a hernia.and probably need surgery to fix it.   UGGGGGG I am so tired of surgeries and hospitals and doctors.  I have to go get a CAT scan later this week.  The good things is I don't need to have anything done right away.  I am not doing anything until after Nay's graduation from basic.  I am not even telling her until after the graduation.  I want her to focus on her while she is away.

With all that happening you know what.... God got this.  I have put everything in His hands and I know everything will turn out good.  I will be fine and Nay will do great in Tx.  I do miss her already even tho I have talked to her several times today. God is watching over my baby. I am looking forward to her graduation in April.  God got this!!

Thursday, February 21, 2013

WHEW

I am still cancer free!!!!!!!  It seemed like I was sitting in that office forever.  Everything came up clear.  I won't need another mammogram until next year.  A huge weight has been taken off my shoulders.  Now I can focus on managing my pain and side effects from the meds.  It really suck I have to take them but if I don't there is a 46% chance of the cancer coming back.  I'm just happy this appointment with Dr. Schultz went well and is over with.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

A lil scared

It has been awhile since I have updated my blog.  Well I have been going thru a lot of changes lately.  I have been having a rough time with the cancer meds I was put on   Letrozole.  It did not like me.  I have bad bone pain and fatigue and it cause my fibromyalgia to flair up real bad.  I have been put on several more pills.  UGGGGG I am still hanging in there.  Tomorrow I go for my mammogram.  I am nervous.  The last time I went thinking that nothing was wrong, I was given a very rude awaking.  I was suppose to also get a MRI but the insurance company doesn't think it is medically necessary... All I can do is shake my head cause it was a MRI that found the microscopic cancer in my right breast so it was definite I needed a mastectomy. 

I have been in a ho hum mood lately.  I have to go to physical therapy to help manage the pain.  I really wish I could go back to work.  But it won't be happening any time soon. I will be trying another medicine and hope the side effects are not as bad.  If my body doesn't agree with this new one I only have 1 other med to try.  Then it just using the lesser of the 3 evils... my doctor's words. 

I am thankful I can still care for my family on my good days. It is frustrating not being able to do as much as I use to but I am still alive.  Now back to this mammogram tomorrow.  *Big Sigh*  I go for the mammo then I go over to my breast doctor's office.  Praying everything turns out ok.  God sure has me on a rough road.  When things get hard for my I have the tendency to get quiet and turn inward.. But I know I shouldn't keep all these feelings inside.  I am just tired of dealing with cancer and the effects of it on my body.  My fibromyalgia was very manageable until the last couple months.  I know things will get under control in the future.

Tomorrow scares me.  

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Tears of joy

One year ago Jan. 4, 2012, my life changed forever.  The phone call I received that evening told me I... ME.. Candy....Candice Bradby had breast cancer.  I knew it was time to stop following my plan for my life and start following Gods plan for my life. 

I didn't post about this on the 4th because my whole family came down with the flu on that day. Well I was on my way to the store to restock on some essentials we needed and I heard this song on the radio                          http://youtu.be/mEv6KdGmESY   All I could do was sit in the car and cry because I am so glad I made it through 2012.  This song is me .... MY Testimony... mine.  This past year has tested everything in me and all I can say is But God..... I survived... I'm cancer free.... I made it through.......  I can't listen to this song with crying because I am so grateful for God's love.  He held on and He got me through one of the toughest years in my life.  I can't wait to see what He has in store for me for 2013.