Friday, November 4, 2016

Hello Stranger

Hi old friend,  It has been awhile. My last post was in Feb of this year and I was celebrating being 4 years cancer free.  I have had a couple of scares but nothing like this new one.  I have been having pains in the lower left side of my abdomen for months and just really didn't think much of it until the pain started waking me up and being more constant.  I went to the ER and they did a CAT scan.... well they found a spot on my liver, I have a trace of fluid between my chest wall and lungs, and a small hernia and kidney stones in my left kidney.  Well I knew about the kidney stones and I was told because the initial hernia was so big it could open back up(its been 3 years since that surgery).  So I wasn't surprised about those 2.  But the spot and fluid was a surprise.

 God promised me the day I was told I have breast cancer that "cancer wasn't going to kill me"  I believe and trust God.  If this spot is cancer God has another journey for me to travel.  I truly believe there is a reason for everything. I know God has my best interest at heart. 

So my doctor want to deal with the spot and fluid first before the hernia and kidney stones.  The pain meds seem to work just takes me some time to get going the next day.  My fibromyalgia seems to be trying to flare up but I'm fighting that also.  So adjusting how I spend my energy is a must.  I think the extra fatigue is also from the other stuff going on with my body.  Oh well Gotta Keep Moving... I have a 5 year old and a 1 year old puppy to keep up with.

Now I just wait until I can have my MRI next WED.  UGGGGGG  Then I won't have the results until Friday.  Part of me wants to cry and fall apart, another part is ready to put on my Wonder Woman outfit and say "Let's Go!!"  Wonder Woman will probably win out..lol

I have been doing pretty well for the last 2 years. The only thing I really have been dealing with is  polypoidal choroidal vasculopathy.  But the Dr has been watching it for the past 6 months and things haven't changed so that's good.  My overall health has been good. It is hard to explain how I feel. I don't want to think about the worst but I don't want to fool myself.  Thats what I did when I found out the lump in my breast was cancer.  I kept telling myself it wasn't cancer hoping and praying it would go away, So part of me is numb, I don't want to feel anything right now. What gets to me the most is it was 5 years ago about this time I found the lump in my breast. SMH.. My hubby has been a great support.  I can't imagine going thu this without him. So my life is on hold until next Friday.  

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

THE DEVIL CAN'T STEAL MY JOY!

Hello,  It has been quite some time since my last post.  Well the devil tried to distract me, even tho I didn't make a post I didn't forget.  Yesterday February 15th 2016 I am 4 years cancer free. 4 long years but I have made it,  God has kept me.. THANK YOU LORD....HALLELUJAH!!!  The devil tried... yes he did but he lost that battle. God is keeping his promise to me.  This journey hasn't been easy but it would have been much harder with God in my life.  God gave me the best husband who have loved me more and more the past 4 years.  I am so very thankful for him.

I was reading a post from 4 years ago and all I could do is cry because I remember that pain. http://candybradby.blogspot.com/2012/02/this-is-soo-hard.html  I remember wondering what my life is going to be like after the mastectomy. I was hurting.  BUT GOD!!!  I don't feel that pain anymore.  God has used me and has showed me His love.  In my worst pain God kept me.  The devil tries to convince you to give up, the pain won't go away, things will never get better.... IT'S A LIE.  Trust in God... Trust Him... I am living proof... read my older post.  It will look bad.. real bad like when I had the brain tumor 2 years ago.  I have videos right after surgery on my Facebook page Surgery Video Now I see why the Lord had me write this blog, to show people living proof trusting in Him in your darkest hour He will come thru.

4 years....  I just took it one day at a time, one week at a time one month at a time and now I can count years at a time.  Yes my life has changed, my body has changed and even my mindset but with the love from my husband, children and family and my church family and last but not least my God I feel stronger than ever. I feel I am living testament to my church's(House Of Champions International Church and Ministries) mission statement.  This is just part of it " No weapon formed against us shall prosper as we are called we are more than conquerors in the Word! We are winners in every area of our lives and we shall all prosper in all that we do. In my darkest hour I asked God to use me.  Thank you for listening Lord.   Yayyyy me 4 years cancer free!!