It's funny how God works. Yesterday was my baby boy Dylan's 1st birthday. Now lately I have been getting frustrated with having to deal with the side effects of the tamoxifen to the point I just wanted to stop taking it. Well after seeing my kids yesterday, my fab daughter Nay just graduating from college and Jay almost in Highschool and lil Dylan.. his life is just starting and don't forget my husband... the smiles on his face yesterday. I have to be around for a very very long time. God is only going to do so much... I have to do my part also.
One of my husband's oldest friends told me yesterday that this is the happiest they have ever seen my husband in his life. I wanted to cry. I turned around and looked at him laughing with family, Jay running around with the little ones, Nay chatting away with friend and Dylan toddling around...all smiles. This is all I ever wanted, to see my family happy. I was very happy that my little brother Cory stopped by. Family is so very important to me. Family is worth fighting for my life. God is not going to fight alone. I have to do my part.
God knows I am hardheaded. So he will wait until he knows I will listen after I have suffered some. Knowing I will hear what He has to say. This time he didn't have to speak. He just showed me. When your eyes are opened by God it's very.....hmmmmmm.. I can't even think of a word to describe the feeling. I just know what needs to be done to get what I want.
Thank you God for my family as crazy and eclectic as they may be, I love them... thank you for renewing my need to fight this cancer with everything I have.