Tamoxifen is yucky. I feel like being a little kid and falling out on the floor kicking and screaming. I haven't felt well for the last 2 weeks. I thought it was just back spasms again. but after a week and a half and the pain got worst I had to go back to the ER. Well Well.... they had to give me morphine to stop my pain and then I had a CAT scan (for the 3rd time in 3 months). This time they found a mass on my ovaries and found that my uterus is the size of a six month pregnant woman. Yes I do look preggo. OK... They did an ultrasound and found that the mass was just fluid and not cancer and I did have a cyst on a ligament connected to my ovary. I also found out that I have more fibroids then I thought. UGGGGGG
Now I did ask my Oncologist if I should have the fibroids that I did have removed before starting tamoxifen. She didn't think I would have a problem.... Well guess what... I am having problems!!! Tamoxifen is known to cause fibroids and cause them to grow. I am surprised how fast they have grown. I have stopped taking the tamoxifen because I don't want to look 9 month pregnant in a couple of weeks. My Oncologist is looking for an Oncology GYN for me. She feels they can treat me best at this time. I just want these things out of me. I finally got my boobs looking like I want now I look pregnant. Maybe at 50 I get my body back....lol
To be honest I wasn't taking the meds like I was suppose to, except for this last month. I did take it almost everyday. I'm thinking if I took them like I am suppose to from the beginning I would probably look 9 months preggo now.
The major issue I am having now is that I am tired of being cut up. Within the last year I have had my gall bladder removed, a breast removed and reconstruction surgery. I am tired of surgeries. The only other surgery I have had in my life was a c-section and it was worth all the pain cause it was to bring my daughter into this world. Now because of YUCKY TAMOXIFEN I will need another surgery. Cancer sucks!!!!! I am hoping they can do some kind of laser surgery or something. I won't know until I meet with this new Dr. So this will make doctor #5 to add to my list..lol
Now the spiritual side of me knows that God is challenging me and watching how I am handling this. Well God I got this!! No matter how tired I get I will keep fighting. I know when this is all well and done I will be rewarded. God just needs to see how strong I am. Well you got one tough chick here. I have too much to live for. I might fuss and whine at times but it doesn't weaken my fight. Thank you God for trusting me and using me. I still think tamoxifen is yucky...lol